Heavens to Betsy, What is Going On with Those Epstein Files?

Oh, sweetie, you are just not going to believe this! Remember how everyone was buzzing about those Jeffrey Epstein files finally seeing the light of day? Well, Deputy Attorney General Todd Blanche — bless his heart, trying to sound so proper — just announced that the Department of Justice missed the deadline to release all of them!

Can you imagine? After all that hullabaloo, they're still dragging their feet! They said they’d release a few hundred thousand today, and then 'several hundred thousand more' in the 'next couple of weeks.' Honey, 'next couple of weeks' sounds an awful lot like 'when we get around to it,' doesn't it? It's enough to make a gal spill her tea!

A Likely Story, They Say!

Now, they’re claiming it’s all about 'protecting every single victim' and making sure they're reviewing everything perfectly. Oh, sweetie, 'protecting victims' is important, of course, but isn't that what they should've been doing before the deadline President Trump signed into law?

Back in my day, when you had a deadline, you met it! No excuses!

And then there's Congressman Massie, bless his heart, watching like a hawk! He says if these documents don't have the names of any accused men, well, then they haven't released everything.

He's got a good point, doesn't he? We all want to know who was involved in that whole sordid mess. And Senator Schumer? He's just beside himself, pointing fingers at President Trump and Attorney General Pam Bondi, saying they're 'hellbent on hiding the truth.'

The Nitty-Gritty, As They Call It

So, here’s the skinny: President Donald Trump signed a law back in November, darling, that mandated the release of all non-exempt Epstein information within 30 days. And wouldn't you know it, that 30 days was Friday. But lo and behold, Mr. Blanche from the DOJ said, 'Nope, not all of it yet!'

• They did release 'several hundred thousand documents' on Friday.
• But they’re promising 'several hundred thousand more' over the next couple of weeks.
• Their official reason for the delay? They’re reviewing everything meticulously to ensure they are 'protecting every single victim.'

Congressman Thomas Massie, bless his sensible heart, led the charge for this law. He's saying he'll know if they're playing straight if the documents released on December 19th — that's *today*, sweetie — actually contain names of men accused of sex crimes.

And Representative Ro Khanna, who worked with Massie, said he hopes they're 'producing real documents of interest that are not overly redacted,' and that they provide a clear timeline for the full production. He's looking for justice for survivors and accountability for the 'rich and powerful men' involved.

Honestly, I Just Can't Even with This Modern Shenanigans!

Oh, sweetie, sometimes I just want to throw my hands up in the air! All this back and forth, all these 'deadlines' that aren't really deadlines. It just makes you wonder, doesn't it? What on earth are they really trying to keep under wraps?

Back in my day, things were much simpler. Or at least, they pretended to be! All these delays and excuses just make an old gal like me shake her head. We just want the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth! Is that so much to ask? Heavens to Betsy, I need another cup of chamomile after this!