Heavens to Betsy! The Christmas Day Scandal You Won't Believe!

Oh, sweetie, you simply must hear what your old grandma overheard! President Trump, bless his heart, decided to celebrate Christmas this year by going on quite the tirade. Instead of spreading festive cheer, he took to his 'Truth Social' platform to unleash a truly dramatic message.

He was wishing a very "Merry Christmas" to all the "Sleazebags" out there who were chummy with that awful Jeffrey Epstein. Can you imagine? Right there on Christmas Day!

He went on and on about how these folks "loved him," gave him "bundles of money," and even visited his infamous island. And then, poof! They "dropped him like a dog" once things got too hot.

Honestly, it's enough to make my teacup rattle! The things people say during the holidays, I tell ya!

My Stars! Grandma's Sarcastic Sip of Tea

Well, I never! Back in my day, Christmas was for carols and kindness, not for calling out "sleazebags" on the internet! (Though I suppose we didn't have the internet back then, did we? Just the telephone party line, and that was plenty of gossip!)

President Trump claims he was the only one who knew to drop Epstein before it was "fashionable." Oh, sweetie, the sheer nerve! It just makes you wonder, doesn't it? As if nobody else could possibly see what was going on!

He even called this whole situation a "Radical Left Witch Hunt," trying to blame everyone else, especially those pesky Democrats. There was even a mention of one "lowlife Republican" named Massie. Heavens, it's a regular soap opera, isn't it?

It’s all just so… dramatic. And on Christmas, no less! I think my pearls are starting to clutch themselves!

Hold On a Minute, Dearie… What Really Happened Here?

Now, while President Trump is busy pointing fingers, let's just quietly remind ourselves of a few little details. The newspapers, bless their fact-checking hearts, have been talking about these Epstein files. And wouldn't you know it, President Trump's name pops up hundreds of times!

Yes, dear, hundreds! He apparently partied with Epstein at his Mar-a-Lago estate. And there are even whispers, confirmed by a federal prosecutor, that he flew on Epstein's private jet "many more times than previously has been reported." Imagine that!

So, while he's saying he was the only one to drop him, it seems there were quite a few connections himself. It’s enough to make you raise an eyebrow, isn’t it?

He says these files are just a distraction from the "tremendous success" of the Republican Party. Oh, honey, that's what they *always* say when things get a little sticky, isn't it? Just like when I used to blame the cat for breaking Grandma Esther's vase!

Well, I Just Can't Even Today! The Outrageous End to a "Merry" Christmas

And then, to top it all off, he takes a swipe at 'The Failing New York Times.' He's claiming their reporting will hurt "so many of their friends," mostly "innocent" ones. Goodness gracious, the drama never ends!

He signed off his festive message with,

Can you believe the audacity? A very ominous, un-Christmas-like message, if you ask me!

It makes you wonder if anyone truly had a peaceful Christmas dinner after reading all that. Honestly, the things people do and say! I need another cup of tea after this whole ordeal. It’s all just too much for poor Grandma!